1.Demostrated fellatio with a horn or drumsticks? yes no
2.Bragged about your ability to fellate your horn or drumsticks? yes no
3.Been jealous of someone else's ability to fellate their horn or drumsticks? yes no
4.Tried to use a female's lower lips on a mouthpiece? yes no
5.Seen someone or been someone actually able to produce a tone with the lower lips?
yes no
6.Demonstrated the sex act using the bell of a horn and a part of your own anatomy? yes no
7.Demonstrated cunnilingus using your mouthpiece or the bell of your horn? yes no
8.Been involved in an underwear rehearsal? yes no
9.Rehearsed naked? yes no
10.Made sexual references to peoples instruments (ie Trumpets do it with 3 fingers, fast tongues, and supple lips)? yes no
11.Bragged to non-band people about how well you blow? yes no
12.Ever put down markings on performance field so you could find a set? yes no
13.Ever seen another school do it? yes no
Section II. (Shows and Such- The Game Day) Have you ever:
14.Performed a show in costume? yes no
15.Performed a show naked or as a flasher? yes no
16.Injured yourself during a performance? yes no
17.Injured someone else during a performance? yes no
18.As a marching band performed and recorded rock and roll? yes no
19.Performed a show that involved animals (cats, dogs, painted chickens, Budweiser Clydesdales)? yes no
Section III. (What Happened Last Night- Band Parties) Have you ever:
20.Made a liquor run for a band party? yes no
21.Been the mixmaster for the band party? yes no
22.Hired a stripper for a band party? yes no
23.Been a stripper for a band party? yes no
24.Been a member of a train at a band party? yes no
25.Been a member of a train being pulled at a band party? yes no
26.Been a part of a daisy chain at a band party? yes no
27.Fucked at a band party? yes no
28.Stayed sober at a band party (this is a crime punishable by law)? yes no
29.Puked at a band party? yes no
30.Been at a band party that has been busted? yes no
31.Been busted at a band party (not the same thing)? yes no
32.Had chugging contests? yes no
33.Had group chugging of a specific drink as a ritual (ie Night Train, Keystone)? yes no
34.Been a party favor (If you dont remember the answer is probably yes)? yes no
35.Had obscene pictures taken when you were a party favor? yes no
36.Played Drinking games with PIA (Person in Authority) present? yes no
37.Did the PIA join in? yes no
38.Been known at a local liquor store because you were in the band? yes no
39.Gotten a discount at a local liquor store because you were in the band? yes no
40.Ever been the keeper of a "secret recipe" for your section? yes no
41.Ever drank a secret recipe? yes no
42.Ever critiqued another sections secret recipe? yes no
43.Ever been at a band party with members of another band? yes no
44.Ever slept with a member of another band? yes no
45.Ever slept with members of 2 different bands on the same road trip? yes no
Section IV. (Road Trippin'- Band Trips) Have you ever:
46.Been on a band road trip? yes no
47.Been on a road trip and stayed sober? yes no
48.Administered a purity test on a road trip? yes no
49.Written a purity test on a road trip? yes no
50.Taken someones virginity on a road trip? yes no
51.Lost your virginity on a road trip? yes no
52.Stripped to underwear on a road trip while on bus/plane? yes no
53.Stripped to bare skin on bus/plane? yes no
54.Been watching while someone stripped to underwear? yes no
55.Been watching when someone stripped to skin? yes no
56.Hired a taxi to make road trip booze run? yes no
57.Slept in any bed but your own? yes no
58.Slept in a bathroom? yes no
59.Slept in the hall? yes no
60.Played more than 6 drinking games in one night? yes no
61.Fucked on a bus/plane? yes no
62.Saw someone fucking on a bus/plane? yes no
63.Made slurping noises under a blanket? yes no
64.Heard slurping noises coming from under a blanket? yes no
65.Awoken to people fucking in the bed next to yours? yes no
66.in your bed? yes no
67.Fucked next to a sleeping person who awoke? yes no
68.Asked awakened person to join in? yes no
69.Had sex on 50 yd line of practice field? yes no
70.Had sex on 50 yd line of true field? yes no
71.Hit on the bride at a wedding reception in your hotel? yes no
72.Been drunk on bus the day you return from road trip? yes no
73.Drank on the bus to head off the hangover? yes no
74.Drank til you passed out? yes no
75.Missed a road trip? yes no
76.Been left on a road trip? yes no
77.Had to take a plane, train, automobile to catch up to the band when you were left behind? yes no
78.Gotten sick from the food on a trip? yes no
79.Crashed a non-band party on a road trip? yes no
80.Cheated on your SO while on a road trip? yes no
81.Cheated on your SO, even though they were on the trip with you? yes no
82.Been the person a commited person cheated with? yes no
83.While staying at a host family's house fucked any member of that family? yes no
84.Ever sang repeated songs for more than 5 hours consecutively (2nd verse same as the 1st, little bit louder, little bit worse)? yes no
85.Cooled your beer cans in hotel pool? yes no
86.Had to dive for cans on the bottom of the pool? yes no
87.Ever formed a conga line behind your director as he was looking for a corkscrew for his winebottle? yes no
88.Ever done extensive damage to a hotel room (ie had to buy a mattress, set fire to a room)? yes no
89.Ever puked more than 10 time while on the trip? yes no
90.Ever used Everclear as a deicer for your horn? yes no
91.Ever used Everclear as a deicer for yourself? yes no
92.Declared themes for buses (ie sex, sleep)? yes no
93.Brought alcohol on the bus in your luggage? yes no
94.Brought alcohol on the bus in your system? yes no
95.Taken a camcorder on trip for non-band purposes? yes no
96.Ever gotten lost looking for a liquor store on a road trip? yes no
97.Had your band bus pulled over? yes no
98.Band eliminated due to felonyacts on a road trip? yes no
99.Ever created an international incident? yes no
Bus Olympics-Have you ever participated in the following:
100.Bus surfing? yes no
101.Stuffing bus seats? yes no
102.Bodybuilding (pyramids to bus ceiling in aisle)? yes no
103.Body passing race -over seats- one body on each side of the aisle? yes no
104.Bus rocking? yes no
Section V. (Crowd Pleasers- The Little Things You Do)
105.Have you ever been at a game where there was a streaker? yes no
106.Did you get a good look? yes no
107.Did you look a second time? yes no
108.Did you WISH you had gotten a good look? yes no
109.Did you get a photo? yes no
110.Did you WISH you had gotten a photo? yes no
Have you ever:
111.Performed oral sex while marching? yes no
112.Been in a band that caused the team to get a penalty during a game? yes no
Section VI. (The Stanford Band- Self-Explanatory)
113.Eaten an organized band breakfast of beer and donuts? yes no
114.Provided for above breakfast? yes no
115.Marched in a show that included forms of human genitalia as designs? yes no
116.Brought aforementioned gentalia to orgasm on the field? yes no
117.Tried to take over field from the team and lost? yes no
118.and won? yes no
119.Had a horn totaled as a result of a performance? yes no
120.Ever compiled a list of anti-fight songs? yes no
121.Been in a band that was banned from tv? yes no
Section VII. (Band Day) Have you ever:
122.Hit on a high school student during a Band Day? yes no
Section VIII. (I Didn't Do It...You Can't Prove Anything) Have you ever:
123.Left the stands in uniform to assist in tearing down the goalposts? yes no
124.Had sex with every member of the opposite sex in your section in a given year? yes no
125.Had sex with EVERY member of your section in a given year? yes no
126.Had sex with every member of the opposite sex of any section of the band in a given year? (This includes flag line, rifle line, dance line, etc.)? yes no
127.Had sex with every member of any section of the band in a given year? yes no
128.Had sex with every member of the oppposite sex in the band in a year? yes no
129.Had sex with every member of the band in a year? yes no
130.Arranged to alter the scoreboard during the game? yes no
131.Been kicked out of a marching band? yes no
132.Marched entirely drunk in a performance (ie parade, pregame, halftime)? yes no
133.Marched stoned in a performance (see previous question)? yes no
134.Gotten drunk during a performance? yes no
135.Gotten stoned during a performance? yes no
136.Fucked the band director? yes no
137.Fucked the band director's spouse? yes no
138.Fucked any member of the band director's immediate family? yes no
139.Fucked a PIA (person in authority) for a grade? yes no
140.Been in the band for more than 6 years consecutively? yes no
141.Been in the band in 2 years that were separated by a decade (or more)? yes no
142.Married a member of another marching band? yes no
143.Married a member of your marching band? yes no
144.TIM SLATER MEMORIAL QUESTION: Ever been known as a sexual legend in more than one marching band? yes no
145.Learned lewd or obscene cheers from another band? yes no
146.Taught lewd or obscene cheers to another band? yes no
147.Gotten out of a ticket because you were in the band? yes no
148.Gotten a ticket because you were in the band? yes no
149.Been a section leader? yes no
150.Performed a solo drunk/stoned? yes no
151.Performed a solo while hungover? yes no
152.Enjoyed playing taps at funerals? yes no
153.Enjoyed hearing taps at funerals? yes no
154.Applauded taps at funerals? yes no
155.Received a scar from your instrument? yes no
156.Ever tried to make the band PC (politically correct)? yes no
157.Succeded? yes no
158.Ever worried that your band was falling into PC? yes no
159.Been right? yes no
160.Played more then one instrument ever in your life? yes no
161.Been the band manager? yes no
162.Ever marched more than one instrument in a season (Percussion or pit equipment does not count)? yes no
163.Ever sung an anti-fight song? yes no
164.Ever written an anti-fight song? yes no
165.Ever been in a pep band that played for a funeral? yes no
166.Ever sang an anti-fight song for the members of that school? yes no
167.Ever sung an anti-fight song for the alums of that school? yes no
168.Ever had your band/section sponsored by a local bar? yes no
169.Used a Plume for sexual things? yes no
170.Had sex in uniform? yes no
171.Had sex in the stands? yes no
172.Had a reputation because you were in the band? yes no
173.Had you earned it? yes no
174.Had a reputation within the band? yes no
175.Became a legend in the band? yes no
176.Became a legend in your own time in the band? yes no
177.Passed out during a performance? yes no
178.Had your actions in the stands upstage the action on the field? yes no
179.Does your band have groupies? yes no
180.Had the sidelined football players start dancing to your stands tunes? yes no
181.Ever been moved due to noise during the game? yes no
182.Ever been moved back the next week for lack of the same offense? yes no
183.Ever had your band attacked by the student section? yes no
184.Hurt a member of the football team? yes no
185.Been hurt by a football team member? yes no
186.Been a regular in the Alumni band? yes no
187.Been in Alumni band for the booze? yes no
188.Alumni band ever skipped a performance to go to the bar? yes no
189.Your band ever skipped a performance to go to the bar? yes no
190.Does your section have a "themesong"? yes no
191.Is there more than 1 version of that song (clean vs. not so clean)? yes no
Have You Ever Had Sex:
192.In the tunnel? yes no
193.In the locker room? yes no
194.In the pressbox? yes no
195.On the pressbox? yes no
196.On the goalposts? yes no
197.Ever scored in the endzone? yes no
198.On the conductors podium/ladder? yes no
199.In the luggage bay of the bus? yes no
200.In the bus bathroom? yes no
Your score:
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Last updated April 8, 1997